


Insomniac

by randomfandom0817



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Light Angst, M/M, Nightmares, Protective Sam Wilson, SHIELD, Sam Wilson is a Gift, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-28 04:27:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19804747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomfandom0817/pseuds/randomfandom0817
Summary: James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. He lived off caffeine and adrenaline, terrified of the monsters behind his eyes. But Sam made it easier.





	Insomniac

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. He had been since Shuri brought him out of cryostasis, promising the HYDRA programming was finally out of his system permanently. He just couldn’t seem to get himself to sleep. After a long day of farming, taking care of his goats, and learning about the things he missed while under HYDRA’s influence, he would stay awake, staring at the stars.

After the battle for Earth, he moved in with Sam Wilson, the newly deemed Captain America. They lived in a small DC apartment, close to the New SHIELD headquarters. 

But despite the comfortable home and stable income from SHIELD, James Buchanan Barnes was still an insomniac. 

He would stay up at night, reading all the books he missed over the years. He excused his late nights by saying he needed to catch up on pop culture. He knew Sam didn’t believe him, but he let Barnes go. 

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. But he didn’t let it affect his work, he swore he wouldn’t let it affect his work. He would drink inhuman amounts of coffee, no cream or sugar. He started living off of caffeine and adrenaline. When he and Sam would go into the field, he would throw himself into his work. When the two got home, Barnes would stay awake, busying himself with cleaning the apartment a bit more than necessary. 

* * *

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. But even supersoldier bodies have limits. The only time Barnes would sleep was when his body was so exhausted that he shut down. Sam would find him passed out in various rooms of the apartment and would gently move him to his own bed or the couch, whichever was closer. He wouldn’t say anything in the morning, he would just bring Barnes a cup of coffee. 

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac, because sleep meant the monsters behind his eyes would return. He’d dream of torture, blood, and gunshots, pain most could barely imagine. He’d wake up screaming. But Sam was always right there, every time. Sam would sit next to Barnes and rub his back, assuring him it was just a dream, he was safe. Sam would never make him talk about it, he would just sit there until he calmed down, offering to make him tea afterwards. Sometimes, Sam would stay. Sometimes, when Sam was there, Barnes could get himself to sleep again. But only when Sam was there.

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac, because he was terrified of what sleep would bring. Sometimes he would stay awake and just stare at the door. He kept weapons in the drawer by his bed, an old habit from his time on the run he was unable to break.

“Hey,” Sam said, gently knocking on his door. “Want to watch a movie with me? I know you’re still awake.”

Barnes shuffled out of his room and saw Sam smiling, holding a DVD case. “Finding Nemo, a classic. Come on. You’ll love it.”

“Okay.”

The two sat on the couch, watching the movie. About halfway through, Sam felt Barnes slump onto his shoulder. He looked over and saw him asleep. Sam smiled and wrapped the blanket tighter around him. And if Sam kissed the top of his head? Well, no one needs to know that but Sam.

* * *

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. The dreams that plagued him when he shut his eyes made sure of that. But Sam made him feel safe. When he suggested that the two share a bed, “Just to help you sleep, Buck,” he agreed. Sam made sleeping easier, made him feel like the monsters would stay away, if he just had Sam.

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. But Sam Wilson made it easier. He still had nightmares, but so did Sam. They’d talk through them together, holding each other close. This closeness translated to the rest of their daily lives, with missions, meetings, and the like. It wasn’t until Sharon Carter confronted them about this closeness that they realized their feelings went beyond friendship.

James Buchanan Barnes was an insomniac. But only when Sam wasn’t there. Instead of worrying about nightmares, Barnes worried about Sam, worried about his safety. But when they were together at home, Bucky Barnes slept without fear of the monsters behind his eyes.


End file.
